Friday, December 31, 2004

Last night I was too tired to journal, so I have to catch up here. We had a very busy day yesterday. I went back to the surgeon for a follow up on my hand and it is healing well other than some numbness that should go away within time. Then we had a meeting with the lady that is doing the illustrations in my Children's book, I Remember When. She is doing an AWESOME job! This book is going to be amazing!! Her name is Linda Philipian, she is a really neat lady. Hopefully within a couple of weeks, I will have a rough draft completed. Then Austin's friend Matthew spent the night with us. He seems to be a really nice kid. They are in the same class at school and in Boy Scouts together. Such a sad story though. Him and his brother are being raised by their great grandma, because his mother and grandma don't want the responsibility. I just don't understand mom's like that. We had a newspaper interview today about Early Onset Alzheimer's and my book Young Hope. It will be out in the newspaper Next Wednesday. What a great way to start off the New year, I guess! Then we took Matthew home and we are fixing to take Austin to Grandma's and we are going to have a night to ourselves. We are going to enjoy the luxury of a jucuzzi suite for the night. It has been so long it almost feels like a date!
Well, Happy New Year to ALL! And may this year bring us much peace and maybe a closer treatment for dementia.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

I have really been tired for some reason today. I did do alittle housework and put a chair together that was delivered. That was a 2 hour task...............but, I did it! I got a phone call from the Marshfield Mail, today. That is a local Newspaper that wants to interview me about Young Hope and having Early Onset Alzheimer's. So, I am scheduled for that Friday morning. Being able to speak out about the disease and educate other's, isn't a bad way to end the year I guess. I have spent most of the week enjoying Austin being home, even though he has so much energy, he tires me quickly sometimes. We have played alot of Scrabble and Electronic Darts. You have to add and spell, so I guess those games help us both. He is growing so fast! Tonight, he asked me, "Why does a man have a penis and a woman doesn't?" Well, I explained that was how babies were made. And after that, he didn't want to hear anymore. He is so funny sometimes, but yet curious. I guess that is what being a kid is all about. We have a big day of errands planned for tomorrow, so I will call it a night.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Today we took down the tree and the decorations. I usually leave it up until New Years, but I was very anxious to get it down for some reason this year. Now I have my living room back to normal. We bought Austin a new desk and chair for his room the other day, the delivery place called and said it was in and they would have it here tomorrow. So, maybe the Easter Bunny will bring him a computer to put on it. He is hoping anyway. We plan on giving him our old one, wiping it clean and letting him have it. I think he will be happy with it. Tomorrow, I would like to work outside a little bit, it is suppose to be in the 60's, unbelieveable for December in Missouri! I hope we don't pay for it later, winter has just begun. Allen should be getting off of work shortly, he is having a tough time adjusting to day shift after working nights for almost 17 years. But, I like having him home at night. I feel safer.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Monday, December 27, 2004

It is hard to believe that this year is almost over. I loose track of time so easy anymore, it seems like days turn into weeks and I loose the dates easily. I try to keep track of things on a calendar though, but if you don't know the day, it doesn't help much. We were going to take the tree down today, but Austin wanted to wait one more day. I usually wait until after New Year's, but this year I am anxious to get it down for some reason. The weather is so unusual for this time of year, it is suppose to be in the 40's and 50's this week, I don't remember winter being like this. I remember when snow use to be up to or past my waist, of course I guess I was smaller then to. It's amazing how I can remember those things, but I can't remember what happened yesterday or last week. I have been very tired today, really no reason, I took it easy today. Could just be thinking about what I have to do tomorrow. Well, that is all for today.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Today has been another good day. Austin is enjoying being home from school and playing with his Christmas presents. I had alot of clean up to do today. I did 3 loads of laundry..............seems like I just get it put away and it is time to start again. Burned all of the Christmas wrap and boxes that we didn't need and stripped our bed. This afternoon, I kind of snoozed in the chair and watched skiing. I taught Austin how to play Scrabble, he has beat me every time, so I am not sure who taught who! Allen called me from work and told me he had made reservations at the Marriott in Springfield. It has an in-room jacuzzi and living room suite. We are going there New Year's Eve. One of Mom's presents to us, was to watch Austin for us, on a night we choose to go out. But, Austin is wanting to spend the night with a freind on New Year's Eve night, we might just let him do that. This is the first New Year's Eve we will have spent together in about 5 years or so, he has always had to work. It will be very nice! I think this Christmas will be the best memorable for the next few years to come, unless next year is even better. Well, I need to go and heat some left over turkey and stuff up for mine and Austin's supper.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Saturday, December 25, 2004

Today has been a very good day! Austin said this was the BEST Christmas ever! He got us up bright and early about 6:20 and we opened presents. He got 5 different bionicles, spiderman web thrower with missles, Children's Bible, DVD/VHS player, 3 DVD's, Eagle necklace, fatwheeled hotwheels, Smores maker and treats to go with it, boyscout knife and 3 winter shirts. Oh and from Santa, he got a gas powered monster truck (that is his favorite, I think) it goes up to 40 mils per hour. Boy, one of those tied to each foot and I could really go to town! From his Aunt Linda from California, he got a $10 gift card to Walmart. Then, his Grandma and Grandpa came over and he got $10 and a $10 gift card to Petsmart (that will help for the pigsupport on the guinea pigs!) Then we had dinner and Barb and Mom, helped me clean up the mess. Allen cooked a really good ham and a turkey breast and I made the fixings to go with it. Allen got a really neat collectable Gerber knife, Marvan The Martian collectable Teapot, Nautica cologne, Memoir of his best friend Brownie that died a few months ago and a knife display case. I got a new Digital Camera (Awesome!), electric blanket throw, 3 deminsional light house picture with a holographic light, perfume and a beautfully special made black and gold cross. From my internet sister Linda in California, she sent a enlarged photo of Me and Allen, which is very special because Allen hates to have his picture taken. It will probably be the only one I ever get. I have 9 members on my new message board, Dementia Rescue. It is looking very good. I think it has been a good day for all........................Merry CHristmas to All and to All a good night!

Love Always, Tracy

Friday, December 24, 2004

I have been busy today doing the last minute things before Christmas. Today, Austin and I, cleaned a huge bag of trash and stuff that he no longer wanted out of his room. I made 2 pumpkin pies and boiled eggs to make deviled eggs. We are having a ham dinner tomorrow. Allen and Austin have banned me from the living room, they are wrapping presents for me. This week has been a trying week emotionally. Allen has a hard time dealing with my lose of functions sometimes and of course that makes it hard for me. I try to let things go as much as I can and deal with it as easily as I can, but that isn't always, easy. Austin is excited about Santa coming tonight, of course I'm not really sure that he stills believes in Santa, although sometimes I think I do! Allen got him one of those gas powered monster trucks that runs outside through dirt, gravel, water and snow. He will have a blast with that I am sure. We are saving that for Santa to bring, the box was to big for me to wrap, so we will sneak it under the tree after he goes to sleep. I think I look forward to this time of year just as much as kids do! Merry Christmas to all!
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Thursday, December 23, 2004

Well, it looks like it isn't going to be a white Christmas after all. The snow line is about 60 miles south of here. But, we do have bitter cold, temperature is suppose to dip to a -10 windchill tonight.........bbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrrrr!We made one more trip to town today and bought a new computer. We found a really good sale on a Gateway with a plasma monitor and it has a CD burner! Now I will have to learn how to burn my own CD's. Allen is off Christmas and Christmas Eve, no big plans. We will have in-laws and friends over for Christmas dinner. We also went and bought Austin a new computer desk for his room. It will hold his T.V, games and computer, so it will give him more space in his room. Well, I meed to go for now.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Today we went to town and played. We went shopping as I swore we would not do, I hate crowds! Then we went to my brother's grave and set up the little Christmas tree and took Austin to Incredible Pizza for lunch..........they have the BEST pizza buffet. And then we finished the dat off with the movies, we saw The Incredibles, it was really a cute movie. We got home about 10pm and called it a night.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Last evening was not a good evening. I am so tired of the name calling and such on DASNI and all of the turmoil, I decided to set up my own message board. I have sent out invites, so I will wait a couple of weeks and see what happens. If it is mean't to be........it will be. Today, I went to my MIL's and she helped me make peanut butter fudge and chocolate nobake cookies. Seems we are having Christmas at our house this year. It will actually be kind of nice. Allen's Mom and Dad and some friends are coming over for dinner. My Mom called me again last night and I told her I appreciated the invite, but we already had plans. She said they are expecting trouble at the dinner anyway..........my 2 nephews can't get along and one of them invited an ex-girlfriend of his brother. I told her I wasn't missing a thing! We were staying home and enjoying the day. I still have a couple of gifts to wrap and get the house clean before Saturday. We are expecting about 6 inches of snow coming into night and tomorrow and it is so cold we will have a white christmas after all!! I need to go for now.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Monday, December 20, 2004

Today has been a good day for the most part. I went to the doctor to do a med follow up and he said I seem to be doing great. I wish he had seen me 3 weeks ago, he would have thought differently I am sure. But, doctors are kinda like the police, they are never there when you need them. Anyway, he gave me an excellent review on Young Hope. He said, "It was very informative and that it would help alot of people in my situation." This made my day, of course. Then we had to run by the store and pick up a few last minute things before Christmas, I do not want to be out in the mass confusion for the rest of the week. Although, Thursday, I do have to go by the cemetary and put a minuature Christmas tree on my brother's grave. He died 28 years ago, this past November. I think I was only about 12 or so. It doesn't seem that long ago. He was 21 years old and sometimes, I miss him so much! Christmas is the most important time of the year for me to visit his grave for personal reasons. I was counting my Christmas cards today and I have 16 so far this year. Of course I have made alot of my friends through DASNI. In which today, I decided for personal reasons to withdraw from the message board for any future use of my own. I will still remain on the board at least through this year, which I think ends in April and I will remain as Host Chat. I feel as Hosting, I can at least help someone from time to time with needed support and not get the irrational, childhood behavior that occurs on DASNI, lately. A good friend of mine told me yesterday, that her group would be coming to an end soon as well. At first, I felt almost empty because these people have been there for me when I needed them, but as I told here, "Life does go on. There is life after Alzheimer's." I often think how neat it must be to make a decision to step away from the disease and make the choice of whther or not to look back. When you are given this disease for whatever reason, you don't have that choice. But, I do understand, this disease is depressing, but if you are able to look beyond that, there is much humor and fulfillment in accomplishments that can be attained as well. Well, I guess I have rambled enough for today.
Love to all and God Bless!

Tracy

Sunday, December 19, 2004

It has been a few days since I have posted, so I decided to post early today. Friday, I had surgery on my hand to remove a ganglion cyst that had began wrapping around the nerves in my hand. I had a block in the arm along with IV medication. The medicine that wasn't suppose to make me sick, cause us to have to stop about every 8-10 miles along our 30 mile journey home, so that I could upchuck on an already empty stomach. Once we got home, I got my P.J's on and went to bed. Allen said that I recieved several e-mails from my friends, Mary Lockhart in Oklahoma and Linda Tucker in California, wishing me well. I want to thank them for their care and concern. Sunday, Allen stayed home from work with me and took over the household chores. He smoked a roast and some chicken and him and Austin cleaned the house for me. God couldn't have given me a better pair of men! Austin was wanting to see where the doctor had cut me, so we showed him the incision, it looked pretty good. About a 1 1/2 inch incision, he sowed stitches on the inside and a butterfly on the outside and wrapped it. Austin thought this was, "pretty cool"! Now remember this is coming from a kid. Allen wanted me to share with you the thought of how anesthesia can affect a person with dementia. I have frontal lobe Epilepsy as well, so I have periodic jerking of the lower extremities in my sleep and since the surgery, that activity has increased. Just a thought for anyone to think about if they are having surgery in the future. Well, today is Sunday and Allen went back to work, so I guess I will hang out with Austin and play games or something, maybe there will be some good shows on T.V. for us to watch later. I am trying to learn how to post pictures on here, so maybe I will work on that today to.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Today has been a fair day, another night of not much sleep. After tomorrow, hopefully that will be cured.......scheduled for surgery at 9:30 A.M.
We went and got our Will and Health Care Directives, lined out today. Seems odd to only be 40 and already have this done. But in all actuality, everyone should have it done by this age. No one knows what the next few minutes hold for us. Then we went and had lunch with Mom Shirley and FIL (Allen's Dad). First time that we have gone out and had lunch like this in a couple of years. We went to Ryan's and Allen had to cut my food for me, due to the pain and loss of strength in my hands. It was all very good, all the way down to dessert. Then Allen had to go and till a garden for a guy that he works with, I set in the truck and dozed off and on, while he did that. Then we finally got home about 4 P.M., just in time to meet the school bus! I fixed a quick supper of chicken and dumplings and finished up what I have to get done by tomorrow. Never thought I would be glad to have surgery done, right now it is the best gift that I can think of.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Today has been a long and busy day. We went to Lebanon and did alittle shopping before my doctor's appointment. Got Austin a new coat, blue/gray, so now he doesn't look a bumble bee in bubble wrap in his black/yellow coat. Seen the doctor at 1:30 and I am scheduled for surgery early Friday afternoon. He said there is a chance the cyst may be all wrapped around the nerves and it could become a complicated surgery. But, let's keep our fingers and toes crossed that it isn't! So, I should be home Friday evening.
The Chapter called me today and said they were fine tuning my brochure, The Voice Of A Child and it should be finalized next week. And the lady that is doing the illustrations for our Children's book is working on some ideas, so we will hopefully get together on that soon. My Publisher said we will be doing a reprint soon, and fix a couple of typos in Young Hope and add Linda Tucker's name as the Editor. I feel so bad for forgetting to put her name in there the first time. Thank God, she understands! I couldn't have done it without her help. I have to get what chores I can get done between now and tomorrow, before surgery on Friday. I finished wrapping all of the presents today. Yeah!
Sometimes, I think we are so misunderstood by our friends. I guess we don't always spell things out clearly and lord only knows I have trouble comprehending what is said many times. I may ask many questions and repeat myself, but it is only because I am trying to get things straight in my own mind and reassure myself of what is going on.
Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

It has been so COLD today! I think it got up to 30 degrees. Allen and I, went and finished our Christmas shopping (stocking stuffer things). I found another Country Christmas CD that I liked. I love this season of the year! My hand is still screaming with pain, the new pills have helped some. Thank God tomorrow is almost here. Then we went and had a nice, quiet lunch in this little town not to far from us and came home and took a nap. I'm tired from the pain and he is tired from no sleep from being up with me this last week. Almost time for Austin to get home from school, I hope he had a good day, it always seems to make his evening better.
Take care and God bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Monday, December 13, 2004

Today started off with a big surprise phone call from my Mom. I hadn't talked to her in almost a year or at least so it seems. She called to invite us to Christmas dinner at my sister's house and to let me know how much she had enjoyed seeing Austin. I told her we wouldn't be there for dinner because of the circumstances and it is if, she doesn't hear a word that I am saying. She is 73 and I often wonder if she doesn't have dementia as well. But of course, she would be the last to admit that she had a problem such as that.
My hand has been SCREAMING in pain all day. I called the doctor for stronger pain pills, I sure hope that helps. Wednesday can't get here soon enough! I got Allen's Christmas presents that I had ordered in the mail today. I sure hope that he likes them, he isn't easy to buy gifts for. He collects Marvin the Martian memoralbilia and old knives. I guess we will know come Christmas. Austin is very excited about Christmas! He keeps trying everyday to get a present opened..............but I make him wait. On Christmas Eve, I always let him open 1 gift of my choice. I talked to my friend Carole from St. Louis on the phone today. It is always nice to know that there is someone out there thinking about you. Also, I need to thank my friend Mary in Oklahoma for being patient and working with me to set this blog up.
Well, I guess this is it for now. Take care and God Bless!

Love Always, Tracy

Sunday, December 12, 2004

Sunday

Today has been a unusually quiet Sunday. Allen is at work and called me with the surprising news that they had evacuated the plant do to a fire in the foam department. Took about an hour and a half to get the fire out with the help of firefighter's. Everyone was safe and sound. My baby brother came by to get Austin today, so they could spend the day together. Austin was alittle upset because his uncle never called him yesterday and he was suppose to spend the night. His computer was down.......how convenient. Guess the phone lines were down to. Anyway, he was taking him to Incredible Pizza and the Bass Pro Museum today. I got Austin a camera, so I hope he gets lots of good pictures. My hand and arm have been giving me fits, I have kept Allen up almost every nite this week because of the pain. Having a baby was nothing compared to this pain! I go to see the surgeon on Wednesday to see about surgery. I have a ganglion cyst in my right wrist that I think is complicated by carpal tunnel. I made 2 batches of peanut butter fudge and neither one turned out. I used to make the BEST p.b. fudge! Oh well, I made a batch of no-bake cookies and they are scrumptious! I visited with my friend Mary on chat today, thank God for this computer. Since being diagnosed, it is my camera to the world.
Take care and God Bless
Love, Tracy

Saturday, December 11, 2004

December 11, 2004

It worked! I didn't say much in my first posting, because it has taken me 2 weeks to do this. I am so proud of myself! It is the little things like this that makes us appreciate life more. Today Allen is back at work, I miss him when he is gone, but I do enjoy my time. Austin and I have been busy cleaning his guinea pig cage out and now he is keeping the cats occupied. Tommy is our newest addition to the family. He is a sweet light gray and white tabby. He is about 4 months old............however if he doesn't leave the Christmas Tree alone, he may not see 5 months. (Just kidding)
I love him anyway.
Well, I better go for now. Love to all that reads my journal and remember that life is a blessing!

Love, Tracy

December 11, 2004

Today is Saturday and I thought I would give this blog thing another try.